Jae is the co-founder and managing director of a company that provides corporate services. She enjoys gaming, puzzles, music and philosophy.
Read her #ADHDStory below.
When did you get diagnosed?
I got diagnosed in early 2024 when I just turned 41.
What was life like before diagnosis?
Growing up, I was very active. I played a lot of sports and was always jumping around the sofa cause I couldn’t sit still in front of the television. I remember daydreaming a lot in class or being disruptive to my classmates by talking to them in the middle of class which resulted in many teachers disliking me. I hated studying but I actually enjoyed doing my Maths homework as I was very interested in Maths. I would only study just before a test or exam as I couldn’t bring myself to study daily. There was a point in my life where I knew I was different, especially when I started getting ostracised and bullied in school. Things got so bad that I was so afraid to go to school and to the extent where I asked my mum to transfer me to a different school. That’s when I realised I needed to learn how to fit in or blend in to make school a safer place for myself.
I was a very curious kid, always being easily intrigued or fascinated by people or things in general. I would always want to satisfy that curiosity and as quickly as that interest came, it would also very quickly die off and I would move on to the next new thing. I was very impulsive in spending too.
My grades in school were pretty average and I managed to enter a local university. But I struggled so badly in university that eventually I decided it wasn’t for me and called it quits. I carried that shame with me for so long because I was surrounded by many friends and relatives who graduated with a degree and I felt like I had let my parents down. Those days were also the darkest days of my life where my mind would be filled with extremely dark thoughts.
What was life like post diagnosis?
The moment I knew I had ADHD, suddenly everything made sense to me. No words can truly describe the mixed emotions I felt. I have since accepted the fact that I have ADHD and no longer freak out when any of my coping mechanisms fails to keep my ADHD characteristics in check.
What do you think are your greatest ADHD strengths?
Hyperfocus: My hyperfocus allows me to complete tasks very quickly, especially at work where I’m called “Speedy Gonzalez.”
Curiosity: I always found the need to satisfy every single curious thought that randomly pops into my mind. Having a hyperactive brain, these random thoughts occur constantly. This also means that I’ll always be on constant random research and readings. I find that I can retain all these random facts forever. It’s as though I have an eidetic memory.
Creativity: Very good at problem solving, having the ability to think out of the box and coming up with lots of creative solutions to problems.
Ability to See the Big Picture: I tend to easily connect the dots and have an innate ability to see the big picture.
How do you manage ADHD in daily life?
Disorganisation: I rely heavily on technology like calendars, timers and notes.
Noise: I take my AirPods everywhere I go so that I don’t get overwhelmed by loud noises. I’ve also invested in noise cancelling headphones for use in office if I need to focus.
Misplacing items: I keep my items at very specific fixed spots.
Procrastination: I make it a habit to attend to emails and tasks immediately, lest the work overwhelms me which may then result in me procrastinating.
Punctuality: I always buffer a lot of time so I am always extremely early and I always make it a point to plan my journey ahead of schedule to avoid getting lost.
Emotional Dysregulation: I try my best to practice mindfulness so that I can be more self-aware of my emotions.
I just started seeking professional help to learn more coping methods which can help better manage my ADHD characteristics.
How would you advise your younger self?
I would tell my younger self to take it easy and know that there is nothing wrong with me. I do not need to live in shame and darkness. I just need to learn to embrace life as it comes. Everything happens for a reason. So be unapologetically you.
Complete this sentence: ADHD is…a part of me and my life’s journey. It has shaped me into who I am today and I will not change a thing about it.
Many thanks for stepping up to be our #Champions4ADHD and spread ADHD Awareness, hope and inspire others. This is an important step to create more understanding, acceptance and opportunities for ADHDers in Singapore. Read more inspiring stories of ADHDers here!
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